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Clothaholics Anonymous

Hello there! You look a little lost… Oh, you’re looking
for the Mother’s Meeting? I’m so sorry, but they meet here in the Library on Tuesdays. Tonight it is “Clothaholics
What’s that – you’ve never heard of Clothaholics Anonymous?
Well, we do tend to be a little shy about our, er, problem; but certainly you’ve met clothaholics before. They look
just like your average citizen.
Take Molly over there, for instance. Positively glowing, isn’t
she! She’s only got a few weeks left before her first little one is due. She
jumped on the cloth diapering bandwagon early, just a few days after her first
positive pregnancy test. Things really went crazy, though, when she hit the
nesting phase. Let’s just say she is now Prepared,
with a capital P – who can blame her, though. Those itty bitty dipes are to die
for. Her husband realised she had a problem when he came home from work one
evening and discovered her in the nursery, practising snappying prefolds on a
Cabbage Patch Kid.
Then there’s Gloria, in the corner with the knitting project.
Gloria started with good old PUL covers, but for her they were a gateway
diaper, leading her to the world of wool. She planned to try a pair of wool
shorties on her daughter “just one time”, but who can stop once they begin,
right? She then tried out longies, night-time soakers and now
she is busy learning to knit so that she can make her own wool covers. Don’t get too close;
you could lose an eye when her knitting needles really get going. 
Next to her is Barry… of course
men can be clothaholics too! He says it all started for him when he heard his
wife say something about bumGenius’ Artist Series – it reminded him somehow of
his baseball card collecting days. Now he is always muttering to himself something
about “getting the whole set”. Rumor has it he stocked up big time on Bubble
and Sweet, hoping than in a few years he can sell them at a profit, and that he
bought his baby boy a Freetime in Lovelace, just so he could complete his
collection of prints.  
This is Brenda… now, Brenda, pull yourself together. Brenda’s
little one is Potty Training, so it is no wonder she is a little teary… What do
you mean it is good news?! It’s terrible! What on earth will she have to do
with her free time? Gloria offered to teach her to knit as a new hobby, but
that only reminded poor Brenda of all the options she never tried.
Thankfully, she can wean herself off the hard stuff by trying out some cloth trainers… no need to go cold turkey, Brenda.
Anyhow, I expect you had better be going…oh, really? Of
course you can stay! Recognizing you have a problem is the first step you know.
I’m sure you’ll fit in around here just fine.
Belinda Lamprecht currently lives in Africa with her
husband, working for an international missions agency and raising her
two kiddos, one who joined the family through adoption and one…ahem…the
old-fashioned way. You can read more about their experiences at

One comment:

  1. Awesome article. I really liked the format you wrote it in. Describes us all to a T.

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