Wednesday, July 22, 2009

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Unexpected Beginnings

Of course we met the usual opposition from every one we knew. Remarks like “You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into!” or “Have you even thought about how hard that will be?” were among many that we heard, but that didn’t stop us. We purchased our pre-folds and covers and began preparing for our baby. In order to ensure that my experience was successful, I bought newborn prefolds and pro-wraps. I felt confident that I was going to be a cloth diaper master from day one.


Things have a way of not working out the way you think they will, and sadly, that was the case for me. My birthing experience was the exact opposite from what I wanted. I wanted a completely natural delivery, but what I got was a transverse baby who would not budge, and a complicated c-section followed by over medication. And then on top of that, I had severe allergic reactions to all of the medicine and depression. I guess when your pediatrician says "Oh, you're the girl who reacted to all those medications! You were the talk of the hospital," at your baby's six month checkup, you know that things probably did not go according to plan. Needless to say, it was not the ideal situation that I had so naievely desired and dreamed of.

When we came home from the hospital I was so overwhelmed with the new role of motherhood and adjusting to nursing that I couldn’t even think about using the cloth diapers. I had no idea how to fold the prefolds and I was so afraid of somehow hurting her. Even though I had spent countless hours researching detergents, folds, different diapers, and covers, I was not prepared for actually using them. One day when I was feeling particularly overwhelmed I just burst into tears. Later that day I said to my husband amid a flood of tears “I’m so stupid. I can’t believe that I thought that I could actually do this. I can’t believe that I wasted all of our money on these diapers and I can’t use them”. He calmly said “Liz, don’t even worry about it. I’ll use the cloth diapers and you can use disposables until you’re ready”.

And that’s what he did. He looked up on-line how to fold prefolds and began using them at every diaper change. He tried different folds until he found the one that he liked. He washed the diapers, made the wipe solution, used cloth wipes; he did everything. Then when our baby was 1 month old, I felt well enough and brave enough to give them a try myself. He taught me how to use the Snappi and fold the prefolds. I can honestly say that if it weren’t for my husband I would be using disposables right now and I would be so disappointed in myself.

56 comments:

Senior Family said...

great post and go to your DH !!

HappilyDomestic said...

What a great story and what a great husband to be willing to give cloth diapering a try! I have had 3 c-sections (about to have my 4th) and so can relate to that absolute overwhelming feeling you have that first month. Our bodies are working so hard to recover from major surgery, plus you add hormonal changes and sleep deprivation to that and you feel like a nut case! I cloth diaper my 1 year old but even when the new baby is born I plan to take a break for about a month. Life is just too hard during that time to add any extra work.
I am glad you figured it out though and that you can feel proud about the choice you made. Good for you! :-)

hammergirl5 said...

Now that's an awesome husband!!

Tina said...

Wow!! What a great guy!! Go Dad!!

Upstatemomof3 said...

Ya for your supportive husband!!!!

Jaime said...

I love your story and your baby is so adorable!! I'm sorry for what you had to go through and your birth didn't go as planned. Your husband is so sweet! I'm glad cloth diapering worked out for you.

idnar82 said...

This is one of the sweetest stories I've heard in a long time. Lucky baby to have such a loving mommy and daddy, and lucky you to have such an involved and thoughtful husband. My hubby is also super involved and supportive, and it has made a world of a difference to me over the course of our children's lives!

J TiBBS said...

I am so glad you shared your story. Your Husband sounds wonderful and so very supportive. You're lucky to have him. But don't beat yourself up. Even if you had our "picture perfect" labor and delivery things often don't work out the way we want. Being a new Mom can be just enough stress on anyone to make things not work out. I'm so glad your Husband was able to help you and that you were able to get the hang of cloth diapering.

Twiggles and Trunks; said...

What an awesome Hubby! *high five* Dude.

The McClelland's said...

What an awesome husband you have! That's great that he took the initiative to use the diapers. Props to him!

Kristin said...

What a wonderful husband. I know how much I have appreciated my husband being supportive of my decision to use cloth for our second child!

Laura W. said...

That is so sweet! It's wonderful that he was/is so supportive of cloth. My husband is the one who suggested it and is on board with it, but I'm pretty sure he won't be doing the laundry anytime soon.

dannyscotland said...

What a loving and understanding husband.

the monkey's mama said...

wow what a sweet sweet story! i loved it!

Kate Wangsgard said...

Thanks for sharing your experience!

Anonymous said...

My husband was so into cloth it was funny anything to save a buck it took a month for him to change our son now it great

MaryAnne said...

Awesome hubby! What kind of cover did you use with the prefolds on a newborn?

Crissy said...

I'm glad you shared that story. I too am a little overwhelmed with the idea of cloth diapering but I really want to do it and be successful at it. (I also had an unplanned c-section and was over-medicated..not fun..and not the way I wanted to bring my daughter into this world). Everything worked out though.

Elizabeth said...

Yeah, I think my husband is a pretty awesome guy!

Mary Anne: we used prowraps newborn covers. They weren't my favorite though, but they are so teeny tiny.

thejepps said...

Like so many things in life sometimes it's just not plausible to take an all or nothing approach. Yes, cloth diapers are wonderful for our babies, but a happy, healthy mom is essential! Whether you knew it or not at the time you guys handled your "plan B" perfectly!

Shaun said...

Thank you for this post! It's nice to know that others are overwhelmed at times too! I'm planning my second c-section this week and I plan on going to disposables for my 2 year old and the baby at first. I just don't think I'll be able to keep up on the laundry like I need to. And your husband is amazing! What a fab dad! :)

The McDougles said...

WTG Hubby! That's awesome and sweet of him! I remember feeling like that when my son was born and didn't actually start using cloth until he was about 4 months.

momof3munchkins said...

Wow! I wish my husband was that supportive. He has yet to change one cloth diaper and I've been using them for 4 months!

smilingsherpa said...

This was a great CD story. We didn't use cloth until our daughter was 3 months old, and my reasons weren't even as valid as yours, I was just intimidated. I just love that we all do the best we can and figure it out eventually - kind of a metaphor for parenting, right?

ONCE upon a time.... said...

your post made me teary-eyed! it is so, so special that your husband is so supportive of the cloth endeavor. you are one lucky lady--and your daughter is lucky to have two devoted, caring, loving parents like you! thanks for sharing!!! ~camille

MaryAnne said...

Good to know about the covers - thanks!

TheClothDiaperWhisperer said...

What a truly supportive and wonderful husband you have. It makes a huge to difference when you have support when you become a new Mom. I really enjoyed reading your post.

Lewru said...

I am emailing this to my husband RIGHT NOW!!! What a great guy!

Arizona Girl said...

Sounds a lot like our story. I was so glad that my husband has been so gunho about doing the cloth diaper thing.

ih0ney said...

WOW, I got the chills reading your story, GOOD kind of chills. The one where it says, WOW What an incredible husband. GO DAD!

Becky said...

great post to read today! Thank you for sharing your struggles.

CherryBlossomMJ said...

He's a keeper.

hosiewosie said...

Aren't husbands just the greatest!

Dee Anne Lane said...

Husbands are sooo wonderful! What an amazing story. I have found as a childbirth educator that successful natural childbirth, breastfeeding, parenting, and, yes, even cloth diapering are very dependent on the encouragement of the husband! Go Dads!!!

Joceline said...

That is a sweet, sweet DH you have! He is such a devoted daddy and supportive husband right when you needed it most!

Christina C. said...

What an AMAZING daddy!!

Anna said...

How awesome that your husband took on cloth diapering! Great post :)

Elizabeth said...

Wow, great story and great husband!

James, Andrea, and Clara Smith said...

What a great guy! He's a keeper. Now remember this when you're tempted to be irritated with him for something else. All I have to do is conjure up my husband pushing pink tennis balls into my back for 42 hours of labor and *poof* no more irritation. : )

Blessings to you and healing from your trumatic birth experience. I hope your heart can heal as well as your body and mind. Enjoy your adorable little girl!

daydreamer said...

This is such a sweet story. Thank you for sharing it.

Anonymous said...

way to go hubby! thanks for sharing that post! my husband and i are TTC and we want to cloth diaper. i am hoping that he will take the reins like this as well and be into it. what a sweetheart!

Dani V. said...

That was so heart-warming it brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful thing for your husband to do.

AC said...

Good job to your hubby! I'm not sure my husband would've been so eager to try out the prefolds. It didn't take me long to convince him that we should use cloth with this baby (our 2nd)--even though I started the conversation with, "You're going to think I'm nuts, but..." Even with the cloth ready & waiting for us, I still waited till our daughter was 2 weeks old before using cloth on her. We have BG 3.0's and once we started using them, we have never gone back!

In related news, I am dying to try prefolds with covers. Wish I had tried those first but cloth was too intimidating before I tried the pocket BG's. Congrats on using them and using them well!

Laura said...

What a sweetie! He sounds like a real keeper. (:

Slee said...

i'm sorry that your birthing experience was so complicated and unpleasant, but I am also very moved by your story. Your husband really did his entire gender a solid there.
So amazed by your story.
And you need hugs! Lots of them.

Sarahjenne said...

That's awesome! What a great husband!

Kelly said...

I am glad you have recovered from the rocky beginning. I know how you feel. I went through a similar birthing experience. But it sure gets better month after month. Glad you had such a supportive hubby

Amy B. said...

Your husband is great! Mine only uses the cloth diapers when I'm home and can unstuff the pockets for him!

bethy said...

that was a great story!

Stacy Whalen said...

This story brought a tear to my eye, and made me appreciate how great our husbands are for supporting us in CDing.

Hannah said...

What a great way for your family to ease into cloth diapering, and what a great husband!

Sarah J. said...

wow, what a great husband!! loved this post, and am going to bookmark it to show it my husband when he gets lazy about CDing..lol

Sarah J. said...

blogged about it here.
http://lainiesmom.blogspot.com/2009/07/another-great-cloth-diaper-giveaway.html

Amanda said...

What a touching story! Way to go to your Hubby!!!

Amanda G.

Christine said...

Wow, I can relate to that horrible overwhelmed feeling 100%. My birth went TERRIBLE and I too had a reaction to medication and had a fever for days - I even reacted to the anesthesia and shook violently the whole c-section. When his father brought him to me for the first time I could barely even stroke his cheek because of the shaking.
We held off on cloth diapers for a while as well ;p

Attila & Tamara said...

What and awesome and REAL story! Kuddos to your hubbie. I couldn't have done my 1st month without my DH either! Yeah and praise God for awesome husbands!